Friendship

I laughed out loud when I saw this. Thanks to "Want to See My Knits?"

Friendship -- None of that Sissy Crud

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?
Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card- Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.



1. When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry basta*#d who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.


3. When you smile -- I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.


7. When you are sick -- stay the heck away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy bum.

9. This is my oath.... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask; "Because you are my friend."



Friendship is like peeing in your pants;
everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.



Send this to 10 of your closest friends,
Then get depressed because you can only think of 4.